Archive for December 2015

The Disquiet of D   Leave a comment

Dissolved
Dissected
Disowned
Discarded
Distracted
Distressed
Dispensed
Dispatched
Dismantled
Disengaged
Disregarded
Disappeared
Dissimulated
Discontinued
Dismembered

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Posted 20/12/2015 by DarKarsean in Uncategorized

Time   Leave a comment

Time:

1am – Monday

Time is never the problem at 1:00am
the past can be an hour, a day,
a week or more away
of all the things it can be
time is never a problem at 1:00aam
what’s on your mind you hear yourself say
two voices sitting on your shoulder, one
speaks to the future the other to the past
but even between them at 1:00 am
time is never the problem
it’s that deafening sound
of every single heart beat
BOOM, BOOM, BOOM
always in time

3:03am – Friday

Rule 303 simply does not exist at
this time of the morning

4am – Tuesday

4am is not much different than 1am
the night is still dark, just
your heart still beats, just
in between has been three hours
of tossing and turning with little sleep
I’ve woken again, I don’t know the reason why
what did I dream that drained me so completely
that the exhaustion of it woke me
what half sleep world exists where it is
impossible to distinguish between a dream
and a clutch of impossible realities
sitting up, I berate myself for my naivety of thoughts
I lay back down, I roll, I toss, I turn
I sleep again, my mind cannot tell me for how long

6am – Thursday

It’s 6am, I know why I am awake
but that doesn’t make it any easier
the alarm clock screams like a banshee
forcing me to rise to at least turn it off
while previous awakenings were just unwelcome
this electronic shrill invades me to my core
the first thoughts in my mind are the
same as every other morning and
most possibly the same inane thoughts
that have woken me countless nights
throughout the years
knowing never makes it any easier
if you cannot stop them from coming
I climb back into bed and roll away from the day

8:15am – Thursday

I stand outside daring myself to enter

9:40am – Sunday

Keyboard ready, mind ready,
company arrives
not unexpected though
we talk about 2am thoughts
each of us has a different way to remember them
or did
practices often lapse when the mind wanders
as one leaves another arrives
(person not idea)
the sun won’t leave
It’s daytime
it’s not time for the tide to change
I could sit here forever
mind is lost

12:00:01pm – Tuesday

Margarine
multigrain roll
cheddar cheese slices
(the cheap ones)
sliced chicken breast
(of course it’s fresh)
one ripe tomato
lunch time
same time
same amount of time
every day
all the time
how your time flies
and their time denied

11:38pm – Friday

Or is it later
I am writing when I should be sleeping
is this the problem
is there a point to all of this
is that the problem
what is it that I have to say that keeps me awake
I am glad for the tablets otherwise I would never sleep
there is a buzz on the phone
a message from someone who knows
me
“Hi – how are you – you ok”?
“I’m fine” I answer
It’s not a lie
But I’m not sure how much truth is in the answer

10.10am – Saturday

Foxtel works on Sydney time
I’m not working
its Saturday – few people do
but we all chase time
time to do the shopping
time to mow the lawn
time to go to the pub
and once a year if you’re lucky
you might visit the resting place
of those whose time has passed
but only if you have the time
spare me the time and energy
or just spare me the time
my energy is long gone

Wednesday

Where has the time gone?

Posted 08/12/2015 by DarKarsean in Uncategorized

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